Simple Joy

My eyes caught three over sized orange wheels rolling towards the ocean. A matching orange seat supported an older woman in a white T-shirt, light khaki pants rolled up to her knees, and bare feet. Her hands hung loose in her lap and her head hung down as her peppered gray hair blew in the wind.

She was placed just where the waves kiss the shore and two men, two women, and three kids surrounded her with love. Her infant grandson screamed in glee as the water touched his toes again and again.

Two other kids ran around her in circles splashing and laughing.

One of the women took her foot and placed it in the water while the other one splashed her legs. Her head remained down, hands in her lap, hair blowing in the wind. I did not see the expression on her face change.

The family happily shared their beach time with her. Taking pictures, engaging her in an ongoing conversation while she remained responseless. She was in the center of all they did.

Eventually the two men wheeled her back onto the beach under an umbrella. Another lady sat there and immediately exclaimed, "Wasn't that just wonderful mom!"

Her expression did not change.

Later as Cass and I were walking home from the beach the two men where wheeling her chair back to their rental house.

It was a quiet walk most of the way until one said, "I just know she loved it!" The other one nodded in agreement.

I watched her head that hung down all day suddenly rise to the sunny sky. Her eyes were squeezed shut and her lips remained fixed in a straight line. She rode the rest of the way home looking towards Heaven.

He was right. She loved it!

Kids, Round Two

I married a man whose kids were grown. Who lived alone with a dog and could walk around naked whenever he desired. Where a calendar didn't exist and "let's go..." meant the luxury of now.

Where vacationing half a year on his other island was possible. And laundry was nothing more than one load. Where toilet paper was bought in rolls instead of bulk packages. And the doors were never shut.

Sticky globs of I don't know what were rare and toothpaste spit didn't litter the sink. When rides in the car involved loud music just because and to not drown out the backseat fight. Where Disney did not hinder the Braves game.

Where colored out of love pictures did not adorn the walls and the counting of the ribs laughter was long gone. Where sparkle rainbows never appeared. When lazy days meant rest.

Where "uh-oh" shouts were not heard and the only mess made was by Goddess. Where shoes were never left out and the sock monster never existed. When ketchup was not a staple in the house.

When marsh mellows were not cooked in the chimanea and the cabinets were not full of sweets. Where napping meant not waking up to painted toenails.

Where Barbies, and Furby's and Polly Pockets never existed and bikes were always put away. Where the pool was to give Goddess a bath in and the outdoor shower never lacked soap.

When snuggling to watch a movie was not common and knock-knock jokes were not told. Where books stayed on the shelf and were not read out loud. Where ponytail holders came in only one color.

When conversations did not involve interruptions and bodily noises were rare. Where food prepared was always eaten and a dishwasher was not needed.

Where I love you and kisses were not heard daily and a house lost the lackluster of home. Where goodnight hugs didn't exist. When a man once lived alone.

Where we now share three more blessings, creating a blended six. When every day I am reminded just how special this man is- Happy Father's Day honey!

An Identified Family

So today, in a sense, it officially begins. We received our final homestudy report. As I write this I am crying tears of joy and sadness. It is so unreal to me to actually be at this point. Since middle school I wanted to adopt. It is so hard to explain, but it is just something I have always known I would do. Imagine my surprise when Ben and I talked about this for the first time in 1999 and this was not something he wanted to do. I told him that I would not nag him about changing his mind. I told him that I would pray about it and if it is something he would ever consider doing then we would proceed. Oh that was hard to let it be.
It was not until 2006 that we talked about this again. It was a friend of mind who was going through adoption that opened us this door for us. I remember telling Ben about this situation and his response being totally different than I expected. Our original discussion ended up that we would consider adoption sometime in the future, but only of an infant. I inquired of a local adoption agency to see what was involved and what the cost were. We were not ready yet to proceed.
In the summer of 2008 we really thought we were not going to have a homestay student and started talking about what to do with the extra bedroom. Adoption came up again and I started looking at the children waiting for a forever family photolistings. I can never look through these listings without my heart breaking for so many kids that need a family. I showed Ben a few of these and we decided we were ready to seriously think about adopting. But I knew we had to be on the same page about this and I said to Ben that I did not want an infant and he felt the same way. We talked more and were completely on the same page about this.... well maybe not everything... as I would adopt like 6 kids and Ben 1 or 2.
We talked with our good friend Angela and it just so happened that the local foster care classes were starting in a week. We decided to proceed and go through this training as we would like to adopt through the foster care system.
So to be at this point where essentially we are being considered as parents for a child(ren) is so unreal to me. I pray for patience as we wait to hear about our inquiries, for wisdom as our file is reviewed for specific children, for guidance as we are presented with possibilities, and for peace as we do not proceed or are not "chosen" for a child.
And here is the sadness part... I pray that for every child that we cannot provide a home for, that someone else will. It makes me so sad to think of children going through life without a forever family. I know that we are not the right parents for every child, but I also strongly believe that somewhere there is- there is the right parent(s) for each child. So I pray for those connections to be made. One quote that I really like is "There are no unwanted children; just unidentified families." I so look forward to the day when we are one less unidentified family.