November 19, 2012

It's the End of the World as I Know It...

It's the end of the world as I know it...and I am trying to feel fine.

The past several years have been a consistent transition of things in my world. Because of an unexpected blessing I was able to take 2012 off from working and thought I would spend a lot of time investing in myself--doing things to develop my mind, heart, and body.

I did do things occasionally for myself. I saw more of the world than ever, found time to read, gave myself a respite of saying no to every opportunity, and began to enjoy singing and playing music again. There were weeks when I was attuned to life and enjoyed it immensely. And there were weeks when I crashed and slept; where worries crept in and my way of coping was to not.

Time invested was not always helping me to grow or develop, but to replenish a depleted me. I feel as though I have had time to recover and heal and am both afraid and antsy for what's next.

So as 2012 comes to a close and I am starting to work again, I am mindful of how easy it is to lose oneself in the midst of every day life. As I was thinking about how to keep balance in life and work and love and kids and marriage and all the other stuff that pulls for our attention, I came across a 21-day "online class" by Molly Mahar ( that helps you develop "clarity about what you are craving for 2013."

I am excited to do this and map out 2013. Not too be confined to plans or a timeline, but to have a clear picture of things I would like to accomplish for me personally on a spiritual, intellectual, physical, financial, and emotional level.

I envision myself as the best me that I can be. Enjoying the journey of making my life all that I believe I was designed to be.

November 5, 2012

The Honeymoon is Over

This week the honeymoon is officially over.

Mike and I have been blessed with an enormous amount of time together to celebrate life as newlyweds. This involved my three blessings adjusting to life on Tybee and the blending of Mike's three kids into our "Brady Bunch."

We are starting a new business ( which is starting to take off and our days at home together are ending. We knew this time would come, but that does not make it any easier.

Mike and I are literally passing each other on or way to-and-from town all week this week. We usually have our weekends together, but he is meeting a beloved friend for a boys weekend while I cheer on Laurel's soccer team in their tournament this weekend. This is the first time (besides a funeral I attended for two days in NYC) that we will be apart. Truth be told, I already dread it. There is the potential that we will be apart the following weekend too.

I know that we were gifted with lots of time and am thankful for that. I also know that as the girls get older our weekends apart will likely be more (after all I am married to a die-hard season ticket holder for UGA).

Sure in the grand scheme of life this is all minor stuff, but change is never easy.

Actually, most of us fear change. The comfort of what we know often paralyzes us to move forward. We remain transfixed in a state of what is instead of embracing the thought of what could be.

We all have hopes and dreams of what we want to try, where we would like to work, where we want to live, what differences we want to make in the world. We put off becoming all that we could be for the future because there isn't time now, or we do not have the money, or because we have kids.

We often always concoct a reason for why not now won't work; instead of finding or own why not way.

There are countless examples of people that we sit in awe of who have dared to live the life they imagined. They started out no different from you and I. I believe that we are all blessed with a crazy, wonderful, wild adventure, yet few of us ever come close to living it out.

My personal prayer is that I do not arrive at my grace safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming, "Wow! What a ride!"

Find one small thing you desire to try and do it. It is not a matter of accomplishing all the big things at once but taking small steps forward. There are things that you desire to do. There are changes you desire to make. There are experiences you desire to have. There are places you desire to live. There are jobs you desire to hold. There is a life you desire to live. Why not now?