Feeling Faith

I am married to a dreamer, who lived in the same place 30 years.

He is married to a doer with a natural wanderlust.

Perhaps because of my gypsy lineage, perhaps because I moved about every 5 years growing up.

Regardless, the sense to discover and explore, overwhelms my soul.

If circumstances were different, I would jump on a plane with my husband and kids and give them an hands-on education.

Because that’s not possible, we are adapting.

Oh, and the fact that our financial situation hinders us. 

For five years we have literally lived by faith that it would all work out.

That’s not completely true- we tried to live by faith.

That meant lots of doubt, questioning, crying why us?

It felt that no matter how hard we tried to make things right, it all still went wrong.

I began to become depressed. 

This was not the life I imagined.

This was not what I wanted for my kids.

I was living on an island, with the beach just around the corner, but literally giving every penny I had to be there.

Something had to change!

Thankfully my husband agreed. 

To get to where we wanted to be (financially and eventually geographically) we had to move.

I was over-concerned with my husband moving for the first time in 30 years, but he seems okay. 

He’s even uttered that he is falling in love with the house we rented.

My girls love it.

We are close to their friends, their schools and their activities.

I am less stressed and find simple joy.

Everything is not fixed, nor are we yet where we want to be financially, but there’s movement forward.

Putting action behind our goals and dreams.

Sometimes to get where we want to be, we must give up the things we think we need. 

The comfort of security of what we’ve always known.

I can’t tell you how many people thought Micheal would spontaneously combust moving off of Tybee.

But It’s a joy to watch him discover new routines.

To talk about all the places we want to visit and know that within a year we will be able to start checking places off that list.

I believe that sometimes we remain in our dire situations because we choose too not take action.

If we keep trying the same things and it doesn’t work, perhaps that’s because we are not suppose to be there.

If your soul burns so passionately for something, you’ll find a way.

Maybe not at all as you thought.

But you’ll get there.

It’s just a matter of when you are really ready to put action behind I just can’t do this anymore.

For the first time in a very long time I feel faith.

As if God is celebrating with us and clapping in joy saying "finally!"

You stubborn girl.... finally.