February 5, 2014

"Friend" or Friend

My closet is full of dark skeletons that I wish to go away, but don't.
 
Over the last several years I have tried to allow who I am to be who I was in life.
 
But the sad truth is that in doing this, I lost a lot.
 
People no longer associated with me.
 
They found fault in everything I did. 
 
They talked behind my back.
 
Truths became twisted to fit their narrow view of understanding.
 
As I was learning to love me, I found others no longer did.
 
My already fragmented trust was broken further.
 
Wasn't this process of being authentically me suppose to be freeing?
 
It was. Just not as I expected.
 
Looking back I realize I lost what held me back from being me.
 
Painful at the time, I now understand it was necessary.
 
Freeing was found in letting go.
 
This not only meant my feelings or emotions or roles, but of other people.
 
I did not choose to let anybody go. They left.
 
And perhaps that is what hurt the most. It wasn't my choice.
 
I felt abandoned and alone.
 
Until I realized that truth.
 
There was still a collection of people who loved me as I became me.
 
It was small, but their love was great. Real.
 
And I would rather have a handful of friends who love me authentically, than a world full of people who love me selfishly.

2 comments:

Vivian said...

...and that my dear is where find out who our real friends are! Much Love and safe travels! See you soon.

Vivian said...

..and that my dear is where find out who our real friends are! Much Love and safe travels! See you soon