June 3, 2017

Smiling Out Loud

It's always been my dream to live at the beach and I do. 

Yet I find that I often cannot make the five block walk to the ocean because I'm rarely home.

Like most of Americans, I drive a 45 minute commute to work to pay for an address at a place I do not get to enjoy.

And living in a hurricane flood zone I am now paying much more to have a house here.

Perhaps because I turned 40 this year.

Or that I had several friends my age die unexpectedly.

Or my gypsy blood runs hot.

I'm ready for change.

I am ready to get out of home ownership.

I'd be more than happy to stay on Tybee, but this old seaside town is becoming a hot expensive tourist destination where long term rentals are near impossible to find.

And that makes sense when you can make triple your monthly mortgage payment renting your house out weekly.

My husband has lived here 30 years this year. 

Moving 13 times in my own life, I cannot grasp 30 years in one place.

And I can't speak for him, but I can help him have his dream of living on a houseboat. 

And his wish to "not die here."

Change is hard.

And as we plan our next adventure, I'll admit I'm scared.

Can Micheal really do this?

Will the finances work out the way we need?

What if?

Fear. It's paralyzing.

But for every road block my mind seems to create, my heart only has so many beats until it stops.

And my soul knows that if we are to continue in our great adventure it's time for the next step.

I heard yesterday from one of my blessings, how I'm ruining her life. 

No my beautiful daughter, I'm showing you life.

I want to show you the world. 

How to dream.

How to explore.

How to learn.

How to appreciate.

To take you to the corners of the world that you have only read about while studying to pass the required test in school.

To show you that there's more to this world then the falsehood of the "American Dream."

To have your circle of friends expand the globe.

So, we have a dream.

And we are starting to make small steps towards it.

Crazy.

Scary.

Exhilarating.

All at the same time.

But isn't that what life should be?

1 comment:

Kyle Shiver said...

Thank you for this blog, as it really hit home with me. Especially the part about not being able to enjoy because you are working so much to pay for it. But isn't if funny though that we sort of operate on the, "work/reward" system. When you have it every day, it isn't so special. ? But whatever it is that you want, I truly believe there is a way. And that you will find it.